My body knows…
I did an impromptu TRE session today. I felt like my body was saying it needed it so I went ahead and did a session alone. It was very nice! What I am finding more and more is that my body does speak to me and let me know what it needs. The key is for me to listen. I do not need to warm up anymore to go into a session, but I still do because I will teach this in the future! Yahoo..
I cannot stress enough the changes in my being/my nervous system. Things that used to trigger me LIKE TOTALLY do not anymore. I still may have some feeling in my body about it, but nothing like it used to be. Conversations with my husband are completely different and I am being myself. I never really thought I wasn’t being me, but I had so many things that I have not said over the years and that is not my husband’s fault.
Being myself in those moments has been very clearing and eye opening. Being myself has not created any chaos either.
BACK TO THE SESSION…kind of got lost in the good stuff this tremoring produces! LOL
I shook for about 15-20 minutes and took a nice long rest before coming up. I felt very good during my session. I find that for me I either understand what is happening-meaning what I am healing from or I don’t and I just let my body tremor how it needs. Sometimes I can go very deep and this is normally when I am being witnessed by another person, and other times I don’t go as deep as when I am alone, or in a group session. This is something I had to understand, because I started wondering if I was doing something wrong. I was not…it is just being human and being connected to other humans and feeling safe in space with another.
I don’t really notice too much except the sensations in my body and how they feel. I just let go. I can’t say, ‘oh my liver is healing,’ or, ‘my 3rd chakra is healing. I don’t have that intuitiveness 100% right now, but I have known in some sessions that I have felt a release in my sacrum, let’s say. This I felt and knew that something had been let go of and healed.
What I find amazing each time is that my body does what it needs to do without help from me. In fact, it doesn’t want any help from me. When I try to hold on it says let go and let me do my thing! LOL
The changes in my life are a reflection of what this tremoring is doing for me.
I can’t tell you that I am all healed. I am not. In fact, sometimes it can get pretty damn ugly all up in myself and in my feelings and not understanding some things, but I am going to keep working my shadow parts of me so I can be 100% me. Not who I think I am or want to be, but who I truly am. I know that with this comes the love and acceptance that I must give myself for my nervous system/inner child/ego to heal. That part of me needs to know that she is loved unconditionally. Loved right now, where I am in all ways. Not whether I quit smoking, or not, or eat crap, or whatever it may be. This healing is about loving myself. The more I heal the more I understand that this right here is what happens. Being who I am without all the CRAP that I have accumulated along the way.
I am getting there. I am so happy to have found TRE/NEUROGENIC YOGA.
I could go through 10 years of talk therapy and never dive as deep as I have in the last so many months. In fact…I have HAD 10+ years of therapy through the years. This is real work and real healing. As much as we think we need healing in our minds…our body must be included. Everything is stored in the body. I am glad that humanity is beginning to see this. It is all connected.
I am grateful.
